Thursday, June 22, 2006

THIS JUST IN! PSYCHIC CASEY SAYS "HONEY, THEY SHRUNK THE ARMY!"

BULLY BOY PRESS -DC.

THIS JUST IN!

GEORGE CASEY IS KNOWN FOR MANY THINGS: POINTING AT REPORTERS AS THOUGH HE WERE SHOOTING A GUN, PURSING HIS LIPS LIKE ONE OF THOSE UGLY "REAL" MODELS IN A CK1 ADVERTISEMENT, AND BEING A FOUR STAR GENERAL.

HE'S JUST ADDED A NEW SKILL TO HIS RESUME! FORETELLER OF THE FUTURE!

PSYCHIC GEORGE, THE BIG ENCHILADA IN IRAQ, PREDICTS TODAY THAT THE U.S. MILITARY PRESENCE IN IRAQ WILL SHRINK.

WITH SECRETARY OF DEFENSE AND PROFESSIONAL LIAR DONALD RUMSFELD AT HIS SIDE, PSYCHIC GEORGE DECLARED, "I'M CONFIDENT THAT WE'LL BE ABLE TO CONTINUE TO TAKE REDUCTIONS OVER THE COURSE OF THIS YEAR."

BEFORE YOU RAISE YOUR HAND TO SHOW YOU TOO ARE SURE, REMEMBER HE WAS STANDING BESIDE THE PROFESSIONAL LIAR.

MORE IMPORTANTLY, REMEMBER WHAT HE SAID IN JANUARY OF THIS YEAR, "THE FORCES ARE STRETCHED. I DON'T THINK THERE IS ANY QUESTION ABOUT THAT."

HAVE MORE FORCES BEEN PUT ON THE GROUND? HAVE RECRUITMENT LEVELS SOARED? DID THE CHAOS AND VIOLENCE STOP IN IRAQ?

NO. NO. AND, NO.

BUT THE AMERICAN PEOPLE WANT THE TROOPS HOME, THERE'S AN ELECTION IN NOVEMBER AND PROFESSIONAL LIAR DONALD RUMSFELD TROTTED CASEY OUT TO DO A 'TRICK' FOR THE PRESS. TOMORROW, RUMORS SAY, RUMSFELD WILL THROW A STICK ON THE WHITE HOUSE LAWN AND GENERAL CASEY WILL RETRIEVE IT.


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