The Daily Jot: THIS JUST IN! CROOKED CLARENCE THOMAS NEEDS HIS PENILE SHEATH!

BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIG MIX & THOMAS FRIEDMAN IS A GREAT MAN & ANN'S MEGA DUB & THE WORLD TODAY JUST NUTS & THE COMMON ILLS -- THE KOOL AID TABLE

TODAY, THE BIASED AND UNETHICAL SUPREME COURT TRAMPLED ON THE CONSTITUTION, ON STATE RIGHTS, AND ON COMMON SENSE.

WE SPOKE WITH CROOKED CLARENCE THOMAS TO GET A HANDLE ON THE MOOD OF THE COURT -- BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIG MIX & THOMAS FRIEDMAN IS A GREAT MAN & ANN'S MEGA DUB & THE WORLD TODAY JUST NUTS & THE COMMON ILLS MUST CREDIT .

WE JOINED CROOKED CLARENCE AS HE ROLLED HIS NUDE AND PORTLY FIGURE AROUND NUDE IN BALUT AT DOI MOI. HE EXPLAINED HE DID THIS ONCE A WEEK TO REMIND HIMSELF OF THE VIETNAM WAR AND "HOW A LOT OF SUCKERS SERVED BUT I DIDN'T. NO LITTLE CLARRY KEPT HIS COWARDLY AND CUTE ASS OUT OF THAT WAR, F**K THE DRAFT. THAT'S WHY I'M THE PERFECT TO SIT ON THE COURT -- WHEN MY COUNTRY WAS AT WAR, I SOUGHT DEFERMENTS TO AVOID SERVING. SOME PEOPLE CALL ME CROOKED CLARENCE -- THEY SEEM TO FOGET THAT I'M ALSO COWARDLY CLARENCE."

SO TODAY, WE ASKED, YOU DECIDED THAT THE CONSTITUTION DID NOT MATTER?

"NO, YOU'VE GOT THAT WRONG!" HE THUNDERED AS HE GRABBED HIS CLOTHES PREPARING TO GET DRESSED WITHOUT SHOWERING THE BALUT OFF HIS BODY. "WE DID NOT DECIDE THAT TODAY! WE DECIDED THAT YEARS AGO! I LAUGH AT THE IDIOTS WHO CALL FOR ME TO RECUSE MYSELF. WHEN HAVE I EVER THOUGHT IT WAS BOUND BY THE LAW? WHEN MY SUGAR DADDIES WERE BRIBING ME WITH MILLIONS OVER THE YEARS? HA!"

AN OBVIOUSLY MIFFED AND HALF-DRESSED (TOP ONLY) CROOKED CLARENCE BEGAN ROOTING AROUND AND THUNDERING, "WHERE IS MY PENILE SHEATH! AS A MEMBER OF THE BLADDER & BOWEL COMMUNITY, I CANNOT GO OUT IN PUBLIC WITHOUT MY PENI PAD TO ABSORB MY INCONTINENCE SPRAYS THAT HAPPEN ON THE HOUR! WHERE IS MY PENILE SHEATH! WHERE!"

AS THESE REPORTERS WALKED OUT, WE OBSERVED LEGAL GOSSIP AND PROFESSIONAL HOMOPHOBE JONATHAN TURLEY SCURRYING IN ON ALL FOURS, WAGGING HIS SAGGY ASS AND EXCLAIMING, "I'LL LICK IT UP, JUDGE THOMAS, I'LL LIKE IT ALL UP!"

FROM THE TCI WIRE:

We start in the US with major campaign news. Marianne Williamson announced yesterday that "as of today, I am unsuspending my campaign for president of the United States."

The moment is important for a number of reasons. First, if you suspend you campaign, you can start it back up. Something Ron DeSantis reminds himself daily as he waits to see Donald Trump convicted. So it's teachable. Second it also shows the need for something more. Marianne suspended her campaign. And then we ended up with Michigan's primary this week which was noteworthy for a number of reasons including that despite having suspended her campaign on February 7th, this week she still got 3% of the vote. She beat the forgettable and unlikable Dean Phillips who was still in the race. She didn't campaign, she did do meet-and-greet, buy ad time, phone bank, media, you name it. And she beat Dean Phillips giving it presumably his best shot.

There is a hunger for something more and there is a need to push the Democratic Party presidential candidate -- whomever that may be -- to fight for the American people.

Yesterday, her campaign released a video of her explaining why she was unsuspending. You can also read that at her website:

As of today, I am unsuspending my Presidential campaign.

All of us have noticed America’s political dynamics are moving in a disturbing direction. Donald Trump’s power is on the incline, and President Biden’s is on the decline. More and more people are saying the quiet part out loud: that despite the fact that the President deserves credit for many of his accomplishments, he is clearly a weak candidate to defeat Donald Trump in 2024.

I, however, am not. My ability to arouse in Americans the angels of our better nature is the most powerful antidote to Trump’s dark and authoritarian vision.

I suspended my campaign because we were losing the horse race. But there is something much bigger than the horse race that’s at stake here. In the words of Mohammed Ali, ‘When the mission is right, the odds don’t matter.”

We cannot sit idly by while the D.C. political class sleepwalks this country into disaster. Too many have followed the directives of the status quo for too long, but we are awakening now. We are ready to act, to take the wheel of history into our hands and turn it in another direction.

We need a President who stands for a new beginning in America, and whether I can help do that as President or in some other way, unsuspending the campaign is a necessary next step.

We will win on the promise of restoring America’s middle class and waging peace both domestically and internationally. From #MedicareForAll to #CeasefireNow in exchange for the hostages, from tuition free college and tech school to a guaranteed living wage, from waging peace to repudiating America’s forever war machine, from subsidized child care to ending America’s War on Drugs, our platform is the winning one.

I will respond to the cult-like personality of Donald Trump with a light-filled vision of hope and possibility. We will become once again a “government of the people, by the people, and for the people” at a time when corporate interests have taken Washington hostage.

I hope you are as moved by this vision as I am. You have supported the campaign before, and I hope you feel moved to support it again.

We must rise to the occasion like never before; so much is riding on what we do now. Even if the most I can do is influence the President, that in itself is a goal worth striving for. For those of us who are deeply committed to Trump not returning to the White House, it’s imperative that we do everything possible to help mount a winning campaign in 2024.

I hope you will help me do this. There is no time to waste. Please give generously so we can restart the engines and race to the top.

They also released the video below that gets to why she is running and why you should care.

Marianne Williamson: I'm Marianne Williamson and when I was growing up, America had a vibrant middle class. The average American worker had decent benefits, could afford a home, could afford a car, could afford a yearly vacation, could afford for one member of the couple to stay home if they wished and could afford to send their kids to college. But over the last fifty years, there's been a massive transfer of wealth to the tune of 50 trillion dollars from the bottom 90% of Americans to the the top 1% -- decimating America's middle class. We all owe President Biden a debt of gratitude for defeating President Trump in 2020. But with the things that they're going to be throwing at us in 2024? We need to submit to the American people an agenda of fundamental economic reform: universal healthcare, tuition-free colleges at state colleges and universities, higher education including tech schools, paternity and maternity leave, free child care and a guaranteed living wage. These are things that are considered moderate positions in every other advanced democracy . But in the United States, people have been trained to expect too little. The American people have been played. What the Democratic Party should do is to truly return to the principles of Franklin Delano Roosevelt -- not just alleviate their suffering but offer them genuine economic reform, not just help people survive in an unjust system, the Democratic Party should end an unjust system. Washington DC, with a few brave exceptions, is filled with two major categories of leaders: Those who don't even care about all the suffering that is going on out there and those who do not have the moral courage to fix it. Let me in there, I will.

That's a powerful message and she's speaking to us.

I don't know a kind way to say this so let's not try to pretty it up: Who the hell is Junior speaking to?

My phone hasn't stopped ringing since the e-mail his campaign sent out late yesterday afternoon "Let’s send a powerful message" (afternoon my time -- PST).

Marianne just spoke about the needs of the American people.

Bobby Kennedy Junior can't do that.

Junior yammered away for over 1600 words and the only time "you" were mentioned was to beg for money.

What did he offer instead?

More attempts to climb on top of the shoulders of his father and the late President John F. Kennedy. For variety, he threw two more men in the mix -- Martin Luther King Jr. -- mentioned only in passing -- and Malcolm X. The last one, that was the most offensive.

Right now, as you read this, you're in the world and you're trying to learn and grow. Some people stop. Junior stopped growing long ago. Which is why he offers the Whitest and most insulting take on Malcolm X you could imagine. I can remember when, in the 80s, his take began to become a dominant take. Articles and books appeared. It was a different take than the spit-on-Malcolm take that was so popular among many. But I don't know that it was a better take. At least when the enemy spits on you, they realize you're a force -- even in death -- to be reckoned with. The new Malcolm was more like a child who returned from a journey and was petted on the head. That's 'history' in Junior's warped mind.

In fairness, it's history he was 'taught.' Lucy Hughes-Hallett wrote an excellent book entitled CLEOPATRA: HISTORIES, DREAMS AND DISTORTIONS. The 1990 book is a must read for critical thinkers and traces how history is flexible and how in one time period one thing is emphasized and in another it's something else. Same person: Cleopatra. But the history and the stories a society tells itself change over time.

Bobby's become fixated on the last century and that's becoming ever more clear. It's the 21st century and he can't cope with it.

And it's bad enough that Junior keeps trying to pretend he can speak for his father (who does have eight other living children) and his uncle but now he's trying to speak for MLK and Malcolm as well?

"What's next?" a friend asked over the phone, "His donation plea where he channels the ghost of Kitty Genovese?"

Exactly.

He's useless as THE DAILY SHOW made clear this week.