BULLY BOY PRESS IN COLLABORATION WITH CEDRIC'S BIG MIX - DC.
UPDATED AT 8:15 P.M.
THIS JUST IN!
CONDI RICE HAS HER OWN SET OF RIDERS.
THE REVELATIONS THAT DICK CHENEY WOULD NOT TOUR WITHOUT A SET OF DEMANDS BEING MET AT EACH STOP HAS LED TO NEWS THAT HE IS NOT ALONE.
SECRETARY OF STATE CONDI RICE HAS HER OWN LIST OF DEMANDS WHEN SHE IS ON THE ROAD.
AT THE TOP OF THE RICE LIST IS THE FOLLOWING "ALL DEMANDS MUST BE MET OR SECRETARY RICE WILL NOT SPEAK AND MAY ORDER THE BOMBING OF YOUR LOCATION."
THE LIST:
*SANDWICH FIXINGS
MUST INCLUDE:
WHITE BREAD
WHITE MEAT TURKEY
MAYO
WHITE CHEESE (MONTEREY)
*DESSERTS ON HAND SHOULD INCLUDE:
VANILLA ICE CREAM
VANILLA PUDDING
WHITE CAKE
WHITE CHOCOLATE ONLY ***NEVER DARK CHOCOLATE***
NO "ESKIMO PIES" **NOTE THAT SECRETARY RICE DOES NOT FIND THAT AMUSING THE WAY COLIN POWELL DID***
*SUITE MUST BE HAVE PLUSH CARPET, WHITE CARPET. WALLS OF SUITE MUST BE PAINTED WHITE.
*SUITE SHOULD CONTAIN A HOME ENTERTAINMENT CENTER
*CDS SHOULD BE PROVIDED.
MUSIC SHOULD INCLUDE CDS BY:
THE BEACH BOYS
BARRY MANILOW
ELVIS PRESLEY
EDGAR WINTER
*DVDS SHOULD BE PROVIDED
DVDS SHOULD INCLUDE:
SONG OF THE SOUTH
GONE WITH THE WIND
ANY MOVIE BY WOODY ALLEN
*SECRETARY RICE DOES NOT ***DOES NOT*** TAKE HER COFFEE "BLACK." ROOM SERVICE SHOULD NEVER ASK THAT QUESTION.
*SECRETARY RICE INSISTS UPON WHITE LINENS FOR BEDDING. NO PATTERNS, NO COLORS.
*WHEN THE SECRETARY REQUESTS "RICE" IT IS TO BE UNDERSTOOD THAT SHE MEANS "WHITE RICE." ***NOT BROWN RICE, NOT DIRTY RICE.****
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