Thursday, March 30, 2006

THIS JUST IN! SECRETARY OF STATE RICE TRIES NEW DIPLOMATIC STRATEGY

BULLY BOY PRESS - BERLIN.

Updated at 9:02 pm.

THIS JUST IN!

SECRETARY OF STATE RICE TRIES NEW DIPLOMATIC STRATEGY!

STATING THAT THE "INTERNATIONAL COMMUNITY" WAS "UNITED" AGAINST IRAN'S NUCLEAR PROGRAM, CONDI RICE THEN PUT HER HANDS ON HER HIPS, LEANED IN, AND STUCK HER TONUGE OUT IN WHAT INTERNATIONAL OBSERVERS ARE CALLING THE NAH-NAH-NAH-NO-ONE-LIKES-YOU! STRATEGY.

"CONDI, TAKES IT TO THE PLAYGROUND," SAID 'DESERT FOX' MADELEINE ALBRIGHT ADMIRINGLY. "MY FATHER TAUGHT HER EVERYTHING SHE KNOWS."

"NOT TRUE," SAID RICE WRAPPING AN ARM AROUND ALBRIGHT. "MAD MADDY SPEAKS 7 LANGUAGES. I ONLY SPEAK 5. IT WAS MAD MADDY WHO TAUGHT ME THAT IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW MANY LANGUAGES YOU
SPEAK --"

"AS LONG AS YOU CAN LIE IN ALL OF THEM!" RICE AND ALBRIGHT FINISHED TOGETHER BEFORE BURSTING INTO GAILS OF LAUGHTER.

"WELL, I'VE GOT TO RUN," SAID MAD MADDY, WIPING AWAY TEARS OF JOY,
"I STILL NEED TO STOP BY THE UNITED NATIONS TO RANSACK SOME ANTIBIOTICS AND VACCINES. THIN OUT THE HERD! THIN OUT THE HERD!"

"I FEEL YOU!" SHOUTED CONDI AS MAD MADDY MOVED AT A PACE MUCH FASTER THAN ONE WOULD EXPECT FROM A WOMAN OF HER GIRTH.

"SHE'S GOOD PEOPLE," CONDI EXPLAINED. "SHE KEEPS IT REAL."



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