Wednesday, September 27, 2006

THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY PLAYS GYPSY ROSE LEE!

 
THIS JUST IN!
 
BULLY BOY PLAYS GYPSY ROSE LEE!
 
WITH A BUBBLE MACHINE AND A BACKBEAT, BULLY BOY DOES A DANCE OF THE FEATHERS AS HE PLAYS PEAK-A-BOO WITH THE NATIONAL INTELLIGENCE ESTIMATE.
 
AFTER ASSERTING YESTERDAY THAT THE PEOPLE COULD DECIDE FOR THEMSELVES, BULLY BOY RELEASES APPROXIMATELY 3 OUT OF 30 PAGES THAT HIS ADMINISTRATION HAS PRE-DETERMINED IS "SAFE" FOR AMERICA TO DECIDE. 
 
WITH A BUMP AND THE GRIND, BULLY BOY LEAVES THE STAGE.
 
WITH REGARDS TO THE TAX PAYER PAID FOR NIE, WILL THE AMERICAN PEOPLE DEMAND FULL FRONTAL?
 
 
Recommended: "Iraq snapshot"


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Tuesday, September 26, 2006

THIS JUST IN! CONDI PUTS ASIDE HER READING AGAIN!

BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.

THIS JUST IN!

CONDI PUTS ASIDE HER READING AGAIN!

PUTTING ASIDE HER READING AND OBLIGATIONS, SECRETARY OF STATE AND SUPER FREAK CONDI RICE TOLD THE NEW YORK POST THAT BILL CLINTON, THE LAST ELECTED PRESIDENT AS HISTORY BOOKS WILL SHOW, DID NOTHING TO FIGHT TERRORISM.

WHEN CONTACTED BY THESE REPORTERS IN HER OFFICE TODAY, CONDI WAS SPINNING THE GLOBE ATTEMPTING TO FIGURE OUT WHICH COUNTRY TO ATTACK NEXT.

"I FEEL LIKE IRAN TODAY," SHE SAID GRINNING.

DID SHE REALLY FEEL THAT THE CLINTON ADMINISTRATION LEFT THE BULLY BOY'S ADMINISTRATION WITH QUOTE: "NO ACTIONABLE PLAN"?

"YES, I DO BELIEVE THAT," SAID RICE WHO DISPLAYED A CATALOGUE PAGE TO THESE REPORTERS ASKING "WHAT DO YOU THINK OF ASTROGLIDE?"

ADMITTING WE WEREN'T AWARE OF IT, ELICTING CHORTLES FROM CONDI RICE, ONE OF US POINTED TO A PILE OF DOCUMENTS ON HER DESK.

SECRETARY RICE NOTED SHE WAS BUSY AS SHE GRABBED HER CREDIT CARD AND BEGAN DIALING BUT TOLD US WE COULD LOOK THROUGH THE DOCUMENTS, "JUST LET ME KNOW IF THERE'S ANYTHING INTERESTING IN THERE, OKAY?"

CONDI RICE BEGAN SPEAKING TO THE PERSON ON THE OTHER END OF THE PHONE, "YES, I AM INTERESTED IN THE BLOW UP DOLLS ADVERTISED ON PAGE 32. TELL ME, ARE THEY DURABLE?"

AS THESE REPORTERS WENT THROUGH THE PILE, FROM BOTTOM TO TOP, CONDI RICE EXPLAINED THE SORT OF USES SHE WOULD PUT A BLOW UP DOLL THROUGH.

"WELL I THINK HALIBURTON COULD MAKE A DURABLE ONE!" CONDI YELLED INTO THE PHONE BEFORE SLAMMING IT DOWN.

SMILING, SHE TURNED TO US AND INQUIRED IF WE HAD FOUND ANYTHING. THESE REPORTERS HANDED HER A PDB.

"BIN LADEN DETERMINED TO STRIKE IN THE UNITED STATES," CONDI RICE READ ALOUD. "HMM. THAT'S INTERESTING. I SHOULD PROBABLY CALL SOMEONE ABOUT THIS . . . OH, LOOK AT THE DATE! AUGUST 8TH. 2001! THAT'S OLD NEWS NOW."

SMILING, CONDI RICE CRUMPLED THE BRIEF, TOSSED IN THE TRASH CAN AND AGAIN EXPLAINED THAT THE BULLY BOY AND HIS ADMINISTRATION HAD DONE EVERYTHING IN THE POWER TO PREVENT 9-11.

"I SHOULD KNOW," CONDI SAID SHOWING THESE REPORTERS OUT OF HER OFFICE, "I WAS THE NATIONAL SECURITY ADVISOR BACK THEN."


Recommended: "Iraq snapshot"
"And the war drags on"
"NYT: Tavernise Returns to the Green Zone Determined to Out-Dexy Dexter Filkins"
"NYT: 'Agencies Say Iraq War Worsens Terrorism Threat' (Mark Mazzetti)"
"NYT: 'Study of Iraq War and Terror Stirs Strong Political Response' (Philip Shenon & Mark Mazzetti)"
"2700 American troops dead since the start of the illegal invasion"
"Who the hell is Alastair Paulin and how did he get so stupid?"
"War comes to class"
"Iraq"
"mondays"
"counterf**k and not in the good way"
"E-mails"
"Visuals, music and Iraq"
"Music"
"That's just the way it is"
"Ruth's Report"
  • Editorial: Darrell Anderson Needs You
  • A Note to Our Readers
  • TV: Heroic Would Be Pasdar in a Loin Cloth
  • Talk
  • Dick & Bully Boy hiding behind others as usual
  • Bully Boy cloud
  • The Tears
  • MyTV's Fascist House
  • Shades Include Green (Party)
  • GreenStone Media
  • About the Times Select . . .
  • Nye-Nye Takes a Fall

  • Monday, September 25, 2006

    Two wire reports

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX present two reports today and note that the American military fatality count in Iraq has now passed 2,700. Over 2700 Americans killed in Bully Boy's illegal war of choice.


    From The Third Estate Sunday Review -- "Editorial: Darrell Anderson Needs You"



    Darrell Anderson. Here's the back story. In January 2003, Darrel Anderson joined the Army. He was sent to Iraq and injured by a roadside bomb. Awarded the Purple Heart, when facing a second deployment to Iraq, Anderson decided to self-check out (January 2005). Like Jeremy Hinzman, Brandon Hughey, Patrick Hart, Kyle Snyder and an estimated 220-plus others, Anderson went to Canada.
    In Canada, he applied for refugee status -- a status regularly granted during the Vietnam era but one Canada has thus far refused to grant to any war resister. Recently, Anderson's attorney apparently missed a deadline for the paper work on that issue.
    However, Anderson met Gail Greer when she was working on a film about war resisters and married Greer who is a Canadian citizen. The marriage should have resulted in granting him legal resident status. He is currently waiting on that announcement from the Canadian government.
    His mother, Anita Anderson, has filled the press in on this month's developments -- this month is when Darrell Anderson told his mother that he was planning on returning to the United States. According to his mother's statements near the start of the month, Darrell was going to return to the United States if the Canadian government did not offer him status. Anderson himself spoke to Jim Warren of The Lexington Herald-Leader for an article published yesterday and it seems the return is no longer in doubt.
    The current plans are to cross the border back into the United States, hold a press conference and then return to Fort Knox. He told Warren, "I decided that I've got to go back and get this over with once and for all, instead of living in limbo up here forever."
    During the Vietnam era, activists advocated for an amensty for those who dodged the draft and those who decided to check themselves out. With the end of the war, the fall of Richard Nixon with the Watergate exposures, and a new president named Jimmy Carter, it was thought that such a policy was possible. That did not happen. Carter granted amnesty to those who dodged the draft. Those who self-checked out were to be handled on a case by case basis. That was the best that government was willing to do as that illegal war came to a close.
    It is highly unlikely that anything's changed in today's political climate. (The amnesty decision was a political decision.) Those who go to Canada know this. The War Resisters Support Campaign provides them with resources, support and information. (And is a worthy charity to donate to.) It is a difficult decision and coming back to the country for any reason (including the funeral of a parent) means risking arrest.
    For Anderson, with no work permit due to his status, Canada meant struggle including living with his Post-Traumatic Syndrome from his experiences in Iraq. Loud noises still startle him after the roadside bomb, sleep usually means nightmares of reliving the experience. For those reasons and others, he made the decision to return to the United States and, in his words to Jim Warren, "I decided that I've got to go back and get this over with once and for all, instead of living in limbo up here forever."
    What can happen next? He could be dishonorably discharged and that would be the end of it. More likely, he will face an Article 32 hearing for desertion and then a court-martial (which could result in jail time). What happens to Darrell Anderson largely depends on us. Are we willing to speak out? Are we willing to show support?
    We're sure the usual suspects will show up for their one-off "Baby cried the day the circus came to town" coverage and that's not going to be good enough. That's not going to do anything. Well, it will let the usual suspects kid themselves that they "covered" the story. It's not a one-day story.
    However the media decides to treat it, we have to be willing to keep this issue alive. Ehren Watada is a success story in terms of attention. It seems, however, as though Kevin Benderman (currently serving a sentence) has been forgotten.
    Darrell Anderson remains opposed to the illegal war. He is a war resister. Anita Anderson intends to be outside Fort Knox and maybe some can be their physically, maybe some can be their in spirit. But how much we work to keep this issue alive will impact the outcome. As Patti Smith sang and wrote "People Have The Power." But they have to use it.
    More information on Darrell Anderson (and other war resisters) can be found at Courage to Resist.

    From The Common Ills --"Iraq snapshot"
    Monday, September 25, 2006. Chaos and violence continue in Iraq, the US military fatality count crosses another marker with little attention, Iran continues to be the focus for Bully Boy's continued war lust, US Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld gets a blistering critique, the 1st Brigade of 1st Armored Division learns that promises of returning home are meaningless as their tour of duty in Iraq gets an extension, war resister Darrell Anderson continues to prepare for his return to the United States, in England Tony Blair comes under criticism from both a would-be-prime-minister and his sister-in-law, and the much trumpeted digital images of of Australian troops playing "cowboy" do not include photos or footage of Jake Kovco.
    After being awarded the Purple Heart and returning from Iraq, Darrell Anderson was informed he was being redeployed to Iraq. Anderson elected to self-check out from the military in January 2005 and went to Canada. Earlier this month Anita Anderson confirmed to the press that her son was considering returning to the United States. Darrell Anderson was on a delayed honeymoon with Gail Greer (whom he met when she was part of a team making a documentary on war resisters). (The documentary was Albert Nerenberg's Escape to Canada.)
    Anderson spoke with Jim Warren (Lexington Herald-Leader) for an article published Saturday where he confirmed that he was returning to the United States at the end of this month (Saturday), explained his reasons for the decision and stated, "I decided that I've got to go back and get this over with once and for all, instead of living in limbo up here forever." Today, Natalie Pona (Toronto Sun) reports that Anderson has again stressed that his decision does not mean the end of his war resistance and that Anderson explained, "To go back and do my prison sentence would just give me freedom. I just want to get in my uniform, go to trial and stand there and tell them I won't participate in their war." Anderson will hold a press conference when at the border and, if not immediately arrested once returning to the US, he will next go to Fort Knox to turn himself in. More information, on Anderson and other war resisters, can be found at Courage to Resist. For the context of Anderson's decision, see Ruth's Report and for the need to speak out see The Third Estate Sunday Review's "Editorial: Darrell Anderson Needs You."
    Anita Anderson has stated she intends to be outside Fort Knox demonstrating her support for her son's stance. As Troy Garity notes in David Zieger's documentary Sir! No Sir!, ". . . in the summer of 68 as thousands of supporters protested the jailing of the Presido 27, the G.I. movement had arrived." Those who learned of Camilo Mejia's brave stand, or Aidan Delgado, or Pablo Paredes, or any other war resisters after the fact can make a difference now by showing their support for Darrell Anderson as well as Ehren Watada, the first comission officer to publicly refuse to serve in Iraq who awaits the military's decision on their next course of action as the Article 32 finding of his case winds its way through the military structure. Ricky Clousing who turned himself in at the start of last month has been charged with desertion and there's no word yet on any charges against Mark Wilkerson who turned himself in at the end of last month. Both war resisters elected to self-check out of the military.
    On Sunday, Mark Mazzetti (New York Times) reported on the National Intelligence Estimate entitled "Trends in Global Terrorism: Implications for the United States ("represents a consensus view of the 16 disparate spy services inside government") which, Mazzetti reports, "asserts that Islamic radicalism, rather than being in retreat, has metastasized and spread across the globe" and "cites the Iraq war as a reason for the diffusion of jihad ideology." Safer but not safe, once claimed the Bully Boy. As Karen DeYoung (Washington Post) reported, "The NIE . . . coincides with public statements by senior intelligence officials describing a different kind of conflict than the one outlined by President Bush in a series of recent speeches marking the fifth anniversary of the Sept. 11, 2001 attacks." CBS' Bill Plante summarized the points of the NIE as follows:
    *The U.S. presence in Iraq is providing new recruits for militant Islam.
    *The movement has spread and is now "self-generating."
    *While inspired by al Qaeda, the radical movement is no longer directly tied to Osama bin Laden.
    *Because of the Internet, the radical Islamist movement is more connected and no longer isolated.
    The reporting on the NIE follows a number of recent reports including Harper's magazine and IPS's reports from last week. For Harper's, Ken Silverstein interviewed, former CIA veteran (15 years) and former head of the Political Islam Strategic Analysis Program, Dr. Emile A. Nakhleh who noted that Iraq war has resulted in the loss of "a generation of good will in the Muslim world" and stated, "There's a civil war in Iraq and our presence is contributing to the violence. We've become a lightening rod -- we're not restricting the violence, we're contributing to it. Iraq has galvanized jihadists; our presence is what is attracting them. We need to get out of there." Noting that interview, Jim Lobe (IPS) also connected Nakhleh's statements to Paul Pillar's Foreign Affairs (periodical of the Council on Foreign Relations) essay at the start of this year following Pillar's retirement from the CIA in 2005. Lobe notes that Pillar addressed the issue of "the [intelligence] communiy had warned policymakers before the Iraq invasion that the war and occupation would 'boost political Islam and increase sympathy for terrorists' objectives' and that a 'deeply divided Iraqi society' would likely erupt into 'violent conflict' unless the occupation authority 'established security and put Iraq on the road to prosperity in the first few weeks or months after the fall of Saddam (Hussein).'"
    Obviously, that did not happen. Meanwhile Australia's ABC reports the NIE's impact in Australia which has led the Federal Opposition demanding that John Howard (the country's prime minister) "come clean about the effects of the war in Iraq" and "Labor's foreign affairs spokesman, Kevin Rudd, . . . [saying] Mr. Howard should release the Australian intelligence agencies' findings about the war. 'Let's have some honesty in the debate,' he [Rudd] said."
    This as, in England, the would-be-prime-minister Gordon Brown, dubbed the second most powerful man in British government -- Chancellor of the Exchequer, Labour party and wanna-be-prime minister in waiting, makes noises of his own. AFX News reports that Brown stated today that"while there must be scope for emergency action, it is in my view right that in future, a parliament, not the executive, makes the final decisions on matters as important as peace and war." On Sunday, as reported by Great Britain's Socialist Worker, Tony Blair's sister-in-law, Lauren Booth, was among over 60,000 participating Saturday in the Time to Go Rally in Manchester and that Booth was chanting, "Yo Blair -- it's time to go, Blair." (*The report was written by Anindya Bhattacharyya.) And today, AFP reports, the White House via mouthpiece Tony Snow finally admitted that the Iraq war "fuel[s] the spread of jihadism".
    And the chaos and violence continues in Iraq.
    Bombings?
    AP reports that a bombing in Ramadi claimed the lives of seven police officers and left seven more wounded. Reuters reports three police officers dead (and ten wounded) in Jurf al-Sakhar after an attack involving "[m]ortar rounds and a suicide truck bomber"; while in Yathrib a man is dead and his daughter wounded after "[a] mortar round landed near" his home.
    Shootings?
    AP reports that an attack on a police station in Musayyib left one police officer dead and six more wounded. Reuters notes a translator for the US military was shot dead in Najaf on Sunday; that an Iraqi soldier died today from gun shot wounds received Sunday in Balad.
    Corpses?
    Reuters reports that nine severed heads were discovered this weekend in Baiji and an additional one today -- "the decapitatated head of a police lieutenant, Sameer Hazim" while, near Baiji, an Iraqi soldier's corpse was discovered Sunday.
    Today, the US military has announced the death of another US soldier who was today "near Mosul" and died later from his wounds. This follows Sunday's passing the 2700 mark for US troops killed in Iraq and the Army's claim (see above) that they are underfunded. Reuters reports that the 147,000 American troops in Iraq are seen by the military as insufficient and that, in addition to extending tours of duty, "The Army also is considering accelerating the deployments for some brigades in a move to try to stop sectarian violence among Sunnis and Shi'ites in Baghdad, the newspaper [Washington Times] reported, citing Pentagon officials."
    Extending tours of duty? No, not the 172 Stryker Brigade. They were already extended when they should have been returning home in August. AP reports that the 1st Brigade of 1st Armored Division "will be kept in place for several weeks beyond their scheduled departure," that the families were notified of this today, and that the Brigade is comprised of an estimated 4,000 soldiers who are currently serving "in the vinicinty of Ramadi".
    The extension comes as US Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld faces a new round of criticism for his handling of his official responsibilities. AP reports that, in "a hearing by the Senate Democratic Policy Committee, Major General John R. S. Batiste stated "I believe that Secretary Rumsfeld and others in the administration did not tell the American people the truth [regarding Iraq] for fear of losing support for the war in Iraq" and that Major General Paul Eaton declared Rumsfeld to be "incompetent strategically, operationally and tactically," therefore, "Mr. Rumsfeld and his immediate team must be replaced or we will see two more years of extraordinary bad decision-making." Safer but not safe, claims the Bully Boy. Reuters reports that Batiste declared in the hearing today, "America [is] arguably less safe now than it was on September 11, 2001" as a result of the Iraq war. William Branigin (Washington Post) reports that Batiste and Eaton were joined by "retired Marine Col. Thomas X. Hammes" in calling for Rumsfeld's resignation and that all three served in Iraq and quotes Hammes stating, "While asking major sacrifices, to include the ultimate sacrifice, from those Americans who are serving in Iraq, we are not even asking our fellow citizens to pay for the war. Instead we are charging it to our children and grandchildren."
    Meanwhile, Greg Zoroya (USA Today) reports that living wills are a new issue of concern to the US Army as "[a] growing number of troops are returning from Iraq and Afghanistan with severe brain damage" -- an estimated "250 troops who returned from war with head wounds that left them -- at least initially -- comatose or unable to care for themselves or respond to people. Brain injuries, most from roadside bombs, are the signature wound of the Iraq war."
    Apparently the Bully Boy's Blood Lust cannot be satisfied because war with Iran appears to be next on the agenda. Norman Solomon (Common Dreams) examines how the media is covering (covering up?) the probably attack. And on Sunday, Ray McGovern spoke in San Francisco. Robert B. Livingston (San Francisco Bay Area Media) reports that McGovern stated his belief in Bully Boy launching a strike (bombing) on Iran before the November elections and why: "McGovern described an administration desperate to protect itself from justice. If Democrats win a majority in Congress impeachment proceedings against the president, for example, could actually proceed (irrespective of Rep. Nancy Pelosi's vow that impeachment is "off the table"). McGovern cited Bush's low popularity poll ratings as a major concern to those advising Bush, and alluded to how the administration hasn't hesitated to use other crises as a convenient way to capitalize on American's propensity to stand behind their government. " Noting the actions of Cindy Sheehan, CODEPINK and others, McGovern stated, "Women in this country have all the guts. We don't need good girls like Nancy Pelosi. We need strong women like Cindy Sheehan."
    Last week, CODEPINK and NOW co-sponsored a Women's Day of Peace in Washington, DC atCamp Democracy. Feminist Wire Daily reports that Olga Vives, vice-president of NOW, addressed the issue of what's beeing cut (domestic programs for women and children) to pay for this war and NOW president Kim Gandy's remarks that "The violence in Iraq has already cost too many lives. Service members and civilians are dying every day in a conflict initiated by George W. Bush. Women must now come together and work toward ending the violence -- a goal that the US government seems incapable of accomplishing."
    On the issue Olga Vives was addressing, the costs of the war are estimated to currently be $317, 400,000,000. A running counter can be found at Tom Hayden's website. The counter is a feature provided by the National Priorities Project and, on their site, US citizens can look at how the cost of the illegal war impacts their own areas as well as see how the cost short changes various programs. The costs continue to rise. As Peter Spiegel reports (Los Angeles Times) the US Army's General Peter J. Schoomaker made the decision to ignore the August 15th deadline for presenting the Army's 2008 budget plan to the Pentagon "after protesting to Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld that the service could not maintain its current level of activity in Iraq plus its other global commitments without billions in additional funding. The decision . . . is believed to be unprecedented and signals a widespread belief within the Army that in absence of significant troop withdrawals from Iraq, funding assumptions must be completely reworked, say current and former Pentagon officals."
    In Australia, news of the digital images of Australian soldiers handling their fire arms in a manner that wasn't seen as professional came as the inquiry into the April 21st Baghdad death of Jake Kovco was winding down. The press was full of speculation that images of Jake Kovco were among the images shocking that nation -- discovered images which were certainly timed well. In the hearing, there was talk of Jake Kovco being a "cowboy" and playing with his gun. The talk had no supporting evidence and the witnesses (including one of Kovco's former roommates) spoke of "hearing" of their claims, not seeing it themselves. Whom did they hear it from? No names were given and the inquiry was apparently comfortable with that. As the issue of digital images showing Australian troops possibly mishandling fire arms continues to be reported by the Australian press, Jake Kovco's name comes up repeatedly. However, The West Australian reports Jake Kovco will not among those pictured because "[t]he internet images relate to the period 2003-05, long before Pte Kovco's unit was in that theatre".
    In legal news, Reuters reports that three of the "Pendleton Eight" will face murder charges with the possiblity of, if found guilty, facing the death penalty for the April 26 death, in Hamdania,of Hashim Ibrahim Awad who was allegedly taken from his home, shot dead and a weapon placed near his body after. The three looking at the prospect of the death penalty if found guilty are John Jodka, Marshall Magincalda and Jerry Shumate. Meanwhile, CBS reports that footage believed to show the deaths of US soldiers Kristian Menchaca and Thomas Tucker had been posted online by a group claiming to be The Mujahedeen Shura Council and that a subtitle in the video footage reads: "The two soldiers belong to the same brigade of the soldier who raped our sister in Mahmoudiya." That is in reference to Abeer Qassim al-Janabi (who CBS names, unlike the New York Times) who was raped and killed -- also killed were her parents Qassim Hamza Raheem and Fakhriya Taha Muhasen and her five-year-old sister Hadeel Qassim Hamza -- on March12, 2006 in the town of Mahmoudiyah. On the rapes and deaths, CBS notes: "The U.S military has charged four soldiers of the 101st Airborne Division -- Spc. James P. Barker, Sgt. Paul E. Cortez, Pfc. Jesse V. Spielman and Pfc. Bryan L. Howard -- in the March 12 alleged rape and murder of 14-year-old Abeer Qassim al-Janabi in Mahmoudiya, about 20 miles south of Baghdad. Sgt. Anthony W. Yribe is accused of failing to report the attack but is not alleged to have been a direct participant. A fifth suspect, Pfc. Steven D. Green, was discharged from the army because of a 'personality disorder' before the allegations became known. He has pleaded not guilty to rape and murder charges and is being held in a civilian court in the United States."
    In US election news, Dave Collins (AP) reports that War Hawk Down Joe Lieberman, who had earlier made concilatory noises to war critics, is back in Hawk drag and denouncing Democratic candidate for US Senate out of Conn. Ned Lamont's endorsement of a timeline for the withdrawal of US troops from Iraq is "doomed to fail" (apparently like Lieberman's own bid for the Democratic nomination this go round) and would "weaken our security" (meaning that he's so busy thinking up smears, he's missed Sunday and Mondays newspapers -- see above for the NIE report). This comes as Joshua Frank (CounterPunch) reports that War Hawk Up Maria Cantwell has a campaign staff doing strange things including, reportedly, attempting to bribe Green opponent (and anti-war candidate) Aaron Dixon if he would bow out of the race. Frank reports: "As Dixon tells it, 'Mark [Wilson] called and basically told me that a lot of people have a lot of money within the Cantwell campaign, and he said that they could put on a fundraiser for Central House that would "blow my mind". He called a week later and basically told me the same thing. I didn't bite, ending this war is too important'."
    Finally, Cindy Sheehan (at BuzzFlash) notes that Bully Boy stated on air to Wolf Blitzer: "Yes, you see - you see it on TV, and that's the power of an enemy that is willing to kill innocent people. But there's also an unbelievable will and resiliency by the Iraqi people.... Admittedly, it seems like a decade ago. I like to tell people when the final history is written on Iraq, it will look like just a comma because there is - my point is, there's a strong will for democracy." Of that idiotic statement, Sheehan writes: "That is 125 commas.With 2701 of our children killed and over 20,000 injured, I would have to type 182 lines filled with commas. Then, if we take in to account the low figure of 100,000 innocent Iraqis killed, I would need pages of commas."



    Friday, September 22, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY & FRIENDS HELP MUSHARRAF PLUG BOOK!

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.

    THIS JUST IN!

    BULLY BOY & FRIENDS HELP MUSHARRAF PLUG BOOK!

    WHEN THE HEADS OF TWO NATIONS MEET, IT CAN BE SERIOUS OR IT CAN
    BE A CHANCE TO HAWK YOUR WARES WHICH IS JUST WHAT PAKISTAN'S PRESIDENT PERVEZ MUSHARRAF DID IN THE ROSE GARDEN TODAY WITH BULLY BOY BESIDE HIM DOING HIS BEST OPRAH.

    NEXT UP IN THE BULLY BOY READING CLUB, MUAMMAR AL-QADDAFI'S AUTOBIOGRPAHY I DID IT FOR THE LOVE.

    TO GIVE THE WHOLE THING EVEN MORE OF A SPLASH OF "PAGE SIX," D.C.'S PROFESSIONAL GOSSIP SHOWED UP ON CNN TO OFFER THAT MUSHARRAF WAS LYING. DUE TO ARMITAGE'S REPUTATION, NO ONE BELIEVED HIM.

    THAT WASN'T HIS REPUTATION FOR TRUTH TELLING -- WHICH HAS BEEN IN TATTERS FOR YEARS. IT WAS HIS REPUTATION AS A PRESS HOG THAT'S SO DESPERATE FOR INK HE'D GLADLY ATTEND THE OPENING OF A JAW.


    Recommended: "Iraq Snapshot"
    "NYT: 5,106 dead in Baghdad during July & August (Richard A. Oppel)"
    "Follow up to yesterday's post"
    "frank, films, iraq"
    "Quick one "
    "Waking, Guns and Butter and my neighbor"
    "The God Wars (humor)"
    "THIS JUST IN! MORE GODLY THAN THOU!"

    Thursday, September 21, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! MORE GODLY THAN THOU!

     
    THIS JUST IN!
     
     
    CAMPAINGING FOR 'MOST NEXT TO GODLINESS,' RICK SANTORUM AND BOB CASEY JUNIOR TACKLE THE REALLY IMPORTANT ISSUES THAT THE U.S. CONGRESS CAN ADDRESS.
     
    IT A BATTLE OF THE CATHOLICS, AS CASEY JUNIOR TALKS ABOUT HIS MISSIONARY WORK AND SANTORUM TALKS ABOUT HIS LOVE FOR ALL OF GOD'S CREATURES (ESPECIALLY DOGS).
     
    NEXT WEEK, SANTORUM WILL ANNOUNCE THAT JESUS HAS ENDORSED HIM AND CASEY JUNIOR WILL TOP IT BY NOTING THAT GOD ENDORSED THE CASEY CAMPAIGN.
     
    "JESUS," EXPLAINED A CASEY STAFFER, "IS A LOVELY MAN TO BE SURE; HOWEVER, HE IS UNMARRIED, HE TRAVELS WITH A LOT OF MEN AND IT JUST LACKS THE KIND OF WEIGHT THAT THE LORD GOD HAS.  REMEMBER THE LORD GOD IS A FAMILY MAN, HE'S JESUS' FATHER.  WE ARE QUITE CONFIDENT THAT ALTHOUGH MORE PEOPLE KNOW JESUS' FACE, THEY REALLY PUT A LOT OF WEIGHT BEHIND THE WORD OF GOD."
     
     
     
    Recommended: "Iraq snapshot"


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    Tuesday, September 19, 2006

    Monday, September 18, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! AT LAST AN ANSWER!

     
    THIS JUST IN!
     
    AT LAST AN ANSWER!
     
     
    IT IS THOUGHT THAT BULLY BOY'S ATTEMPTS TO TIE LITERACY INTO DEMOCRACY WAS AN ATTEMPT ON HIS PART OF LAYING DOWN A DEFENSE SHOULD HE BE CHARGED WITH WAR CRIMES FOR THE ILLEGAL WAR IN IRAQ.
     
    IT WAS ALSO NOTED THAT POSSIBLY LAURA BUSH WASN'T THE BEST PERSON TO HEAD THE GLOBAL LITERACY CONFERENCE.
     
    SAID SECRETARY OF STATE CONDI RICE, "DID YOU SEE STANLEY & IRIS?  JANE FONDA TAUGHT ROBERT DENIRO TO READ IN LESS THAN 2 HOURS.  LAST LADY LAURA'S HAD WHAT, 30, 40? 60? YEARS NOW TO TEACH BULLY BOY HOW TO READ AND HE STILL CAN'T."
     
    WHEN THESE REPORTERS CORRECTED SECRETARY RICE THAT BULLY BOY AND LAURA BUSH WILL HAVE BEEN MARRIED 29 YEARS IN NOVEMBER, SECRETARY RICE RESPONDED, "BITTER?  NO, I'M NOT BITTER.  IF HE WANTS TO STAY WITH TIRED & OLD, HAVE AT IT.  IF HE DOESN'T KNOW A FRESH FREAK WHEN HE SEES IT, HIS LOSS."
     
     
     
    Recommended: "Iraq Snapshot"


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    Friday, September 15, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! D.C. LOVE GOES SOUR! ON A MUSICAL NOTE!

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.

    THIS JUST IN!
     
    D.C. LOVE GOES SOUR!
     
    ON A MUSICAL NOTE!
     
    IT STARTED OUT SO WONDERFUL TODAY.  BULLY BOY HELD A PRESS CONFERENCE AND, BECAUSE HE REMEMBERED TO ZIP HIS FLY, HE KNEW THE PRESS WOULD HAIL HIM AS A GENIUS.
     
    BUT THE PATH OF LOVE IS ALWAYS ROCKY.
     
    IT STARTED OFF WITH SO MUCH PROMISE.  AT ONE POINT, BULLY BOY INTERRUPTED HIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT TO ANNOUNCE HIS LOVE: "DAVE? HE'S BACK!"
     
    THE BEAUTY WAS DAVE STRETCH GREGORY. 
     
    BULLY BOY COULDN'T HELP BRAGGING ON HIS SPECIAL LOVE, "I MUST SAY, HAVING GONE THROUGH THOSE GYRATIONS, YOU'RE LOOKING BEAUTIFUL TODAY, DAVE."
     
    BUT THEN TEMPERS FLARED AND BULLY BOY TRIED TO SILENCE HIS BOYFRIEND WITH A CRY OF "NEXT MAN!"
     
    BUT STRETCH WASN'T HAVING ANY OF THAT.
     
    DAVID GREGORY WAS ALL, "WHO DO YOU THINK I AM?"
     
    AND BULLY BOY WAS BUSTING MOVES, SHAKING HIS HIPS, POINTING AT DAVE AND ALL, "DO YOU KNOW I MADE HIM LEAVE?  DO YOU KNOW HE BEGGED TO STAY WITH ME?  HE WASN'T MAN ENOUGH FOR ME?"
     
    DAVE KEPT PROVING THAT HE DID BEG TO STAY BY REPEATEDLY BEGGING THE BULLY BOY IN FRONT OF EVERYONE.
     
    BULLY BOY JUST KEPT SAYING "NEXT MAN" AND "DAVID, NEXT MAN PLEASE.  THANK YOU." 
     
    AS TEMPERS FLARED, BULLY BOY STOPPED HIS FINGERS AND SAID, "GIRL, YOU BETTER RECOGNIZE THE GAME."
     
    DISSED AND DISMISSED, IN SONG NO LESS, BY THE BULLY BOY.  AFTER BEING CALLED "BEAUTIFUL".  IT'S A HEARTACHE, STRETCH, NOTHING BUT A HEARTACHE.
     
     
    Recommended: "Iraq snapshot"


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    Thursday, September 14, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY'S WET NURSE LETS HIM DOWN!

    BULLY BOY PRESS -- DC.& KANSAS.
     
    THIS JUST IN!
     
    BULLY BOY'S WET NURSE LETS HIM DOWN!
     
    IN KANSAS,  INTERNATIONAL BILLIE JEAN KING LOOK-A-LIKE AND ATTORNEY GENERAL ALBERTO GONZALES SOUGHT OUT A NEW IDENTITY: "NET NANNY!"
     
    THE NATIONAL NET NANNY WOULD RATHER TALK THAT ("EVERY DAY") THEN ADDRESS THE FACT THAT "INTERNATIONAL TERRORIST LUIS POSADA CARRILES COULD BE FREED WITHIN A MONTH IN THE UNITED STATES" THANKS TO GONZALES REFUSE TO CALL THOSE WHO PLAN TO AN AIRLINE EXPLOSION 'TERRORISTS'. 
     
    TOO BUSY PLAYING NET NANNY TO REVIEW ALL THE TRANSCRIPTS FROM THE ILLEGAL SPYING ON AMERICAN CITIZENS, GONZALES LEFT BULLY BOY HIGH AND DRY.
     
     
    ONE MINUTE HE WAS STRUTTING AND CROWING THROUGH CONGRESS ABOUT HOW HE "WILL RESIST ANY BILL THAT DOES NOT ENABLE THIS PROGRAM TO GO FORWARD WITH LEGAL CLAIRTY."
     
    THE NEXT?
     
    G.O.P. SMACKDOWN.
     
    SUCKERED PUNCH BY COLIN POWELL!
     
    POWELL OPPOSES "THE PART OF THE PROPOSAL THAT WOULD AMEND THE INTERPRETATION OF ARTICLE III OF THE GENEVA CONVENTIONS" AND WROTE DOWN HIS OPPOSITION IN A LETTER TO JOHN MCCAIN.
     
    MEAN GIRL BULLY BOY'S RESPONSE? 
     
    "THERE'S ALL KINDS OF LETTERS COMING OUT," HE SNIPED.  "IF I EVER LEARN HOW TO READ I MIGHT CARE ABOUT SOME OF THEM."
     
     
    Recommended: "Iraq Snapshot"


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    Wednesday, September 13, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! FRESH FROM LAST WEEK'S CAT FIGHT, R. NOVAK SAYS 'BRING IT!'

     
    THIS JUST IN!
     
    FRESH FROM LAST WEEK'S CATFIGHT, ROBERT NOVAK SAYS 'BRING IT!'
     
    TORE UP FROM THE FLOOR UP ROBERT NOVAK IS STILL MENDING BRUISES FROM LAST WEEK'S CAT FIGHT WITH THE CORPORATE WORLD MUSE AND SOMETIME NEW YORK TIMES CONTRIBUTOR THOMAS FRIEDMAN.
     
    AS MOST MAY KNOW, FRIEDMAN FELT NOVAK WAS TREADING ON HIS OWN DESIRES TO DRESS UP AS MARILYN MONROE WHEN NOVAK SHOWED UP AT THE HOME OF THOMAS AND BETINNA FRIEDMAN WEARING A BLONDE WIG AND BLUE EVENING DRESS ("STRAPLESS, THAT HUGGED HIM TOO TIGHTLY AROUND THE CHEST AND SEEMED TO RIDE UP INTO HIS ARM PITS WHICH PROBABLY EXPLAINED THE STAINS").
     
    FRIEDMAN IMMEDIATELY LEPT TO THE CONCLUSION THAT ROBERT NOVAK WAS ATTEMPTING TO BE A "YOUNG MARILYN" MONROE.
     
    IN FACT TORE UP FROM THE FLOOR UP NOVAK JUST WANTED TO WALK A MILE IN VALERIE PLAME'S HEELS AND FEEL WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO BE LOVED AND BEAUTIFUL. 
     
    THE CAT FIGHT BETWEEN FRIEDMAN AND NOVAK RESULTED IN MULTIPLE BRUISES FOR NOVAK AND 3 LOST TEETH AS WELL AS ONE NASTY SCRATCH ON FRIEDMAN'S RIGHT, FRONT HOOF.
     
    FRESH FROM THAT CAT FIGHT, NOVAK'S SPOILING FOR ANOTHER AND SNARLING 'BRING IT!' TO RICHIE ARMITAGE, THE NEW BARBARA HOWAR OF THE D.C. SET.
     
     
     
    ARMITAGE ALLEGEDLY RESPONDED, "HOW DARE HE ACCUSE ME OF NON-CHITCHAT.  I'M THE CHITCHATTER OF D.C.  I STOP IN AT BEAUTY PARLORS JUST TO HONE MY SKILLS.  I'VE CHIT-CHATTED WITH THE BEST, I'VE CHITCHATTED WITH THE WORST.  AND LET ME JUST SAY THAT ROBERT NOVAK IS NO RONA BARRETT!"
     
    WITH THAT, ARMITAGE EXCUSED HIMSELF NOTING THAT HE WAS RUSHING OFF TO GO JUMP INTO THE SUPREME COURT FOUNTAIN.
     
    WHEN GIVEN THE CHANCE FOR A REBUTAL, NOVAK SAID, "RICHIE IS ONE CRAZY B**CH."
     
     
     
     
     


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    Tuesday, September 12, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! ALBERTO GONZALES DOESN'T THINK CHRISTMAS IS SO HOT!

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.

    THIS JUST IN!

    ALBERTO GONZALES DOESN'T THINK CHRISTMAS IS SO HOT!

    AND HE'S NOT TOO CRAZY ABOUT JULY 4TH EITHER!

    SPEAKING TO THE GLITTERATI AT THE 54TH ANNUAL ATTORNEY GENERAL'S AWARDS CEREMONY, INTERNATIONAL BILLIE JEAN KING LOOK-A-LIKE AND ATTORNEY GENERAL SUCKED UP HARD FOR THIS YEAR'S J. EDGAR HOOVER MEMORIAL AWARD BY OPENING WITH, "THIS IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE EVENTS OF THE YEAR." TAKE THAT CHRISTMAS AND JULY 4TH!

    WEARING A SILK BLUE VERA WANG WRAP, OLIVE PARKA HIKING BOOTS AND A WRIST CORSAGE, GONZALES WAS KISSING MAJOR ATTORNEY BUTT AFTER HIS MYSTERIOUS SHUT OUT IN THE CATEGORY OF MOST VILE CREATURE IN LAW (INSIDERS SWEAR RICHARD POSNER IS A LOCK IN THIS CATEGORY).

    DABBING A TEAR FROM HIS EYE (EMCEE ANTON SCALIA HISSED IT WAS A CROCODILE TEAR INTENDED TO GARNER SYMPATHY), GONZALES DECLARED, "SOMETIMES OUR JOBS REQUIRE US TO SPEND MORE WAKING HOURS WITH OUR PROFESSIONAL FAMILIES THAN OUR ACTUAL FAMILIES, AT HOME" BEFORE ADDING, "FORTUNATELY ILLEGAL, WARRANTLESS WIRETAPPING ALLOWS US TO KEEP A CLOSE WATCH ON OUR FAMILIES THE SAME WAY IT ALLOWS US TO SPY ON OTHER AMERICANS."

    THE REMARK WAS GREETED WITH ONLY MODERATE LAUGHTER AND IT WAS, LOUDLY, NOTED THAT WHEN GONZALES TURNED TO LEAVE THE STAGE, THE BACK OF HIS WRAP WAS TUCKED INTO HIS PANTY HOSE.

    THOUGH HE ARRIVED STAG, GONZALES INSISTED THAT RICHARD NIXON WAS HIS DATE FOR THE EVENING "IN SPIRIT."


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    "THIS JUST IN! CHENEY BUSTS A RHYME OR SOMETHUN!"


    Monday, September 11, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! CHENEY BUSTS A RHYME OR SOMETHUN!

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.

    THIS JUST IN!

    CHENEY BUSTS A RHYME OR SOMETHUN'!

    ORIGINAL GANGSTA DICK CHENEY, THE ORIGINAL OL' DIRTY BASTARD, CAME OUT SWINGING SUNDAY STATING THAT WAR CRITICS (OVER 63% OF THE AMERICAN ADULT POPULATION ACCORDING TO RECENT POLLS) WERE ENCOURAGING TERRORISM. SAID THE KRB/HALLIBURTON BLING-BLING MASTER, "SUGGESTIONS, FOR EXAMPLE, THAT WE SHOULD WITHDRAW U.S. FORCES FROM IRAQ SIMPLY FEED INTO THAT WHOLE NOTION, VALIDATES THE STRATEGY OF THE TERRORISTS."

    SAID A FORMER WHITE HOUSE EMPLOYEE WHO STILL LURKS, AND SWEARS HE'S NOT SCOTTY MCCLELLAN, OF DA DICKSTER DUMPSTER DIVING REMARKS, "WHEN YOU AIN'T GOT NOTHING, YOU GOT NOTHING TO LOSE." WHEN TOLD HE WAS QUOTING BOB DYLAN, THE FORMER INSIDER SWORE THAT WAS NOT THE CASE AND BEGGED THAT THESE REPORTERS FIND A TOBY KEITH LYRIC TO SUBSTITUTE INSTEAD.

    NO SOONER DID THE FORMER INSIDER BEGIN SWEATING THAN DA DICKSTER AND HIS DICK POSSE SWUNG BY.

    "YEAH, I SAID IT, WHAT YOU GONNA F**KING DO ABOUT IT?" CHALLENGED DA DICKSTER AS HE ATTEMPTED TO THROW GANG SIGNS BUT ENDED UP LOOKING LIKE A DRUNKEN CROSSING GUARD. "I'LL SAY IT AGAIN. WORD TO YOUR MAMMA!"

    WHEN THE SUBJECT WAS CHANGED TO THE ISSUE OF HIS POSSE, DER DICKSTER GRABBED HIS CROTCH AND EXCLAIMED, "THEY ALL UP IN MY JOCK! AT LEAST I AIN'T ROLLING WITH NO 'FART POSSE' WHICH IS WHAT OL' BULLY BOY GOT GOING ON. WORD."

    WHEN THESE REPORTERS ASKED HIM OF STATEMENTS THAT THE AL-ANBAR PROVINCE IN IRAQ WAS PROBABLY LOST, DER DICKSTER BEGAN A LENGTHY SHOUT OUT TO HIS 'PROPERS' (WE BELIEVE ADOLF HITLER GOT NAMED CHECKED SOMEWHERE BETWEEN AUGSTO PINOCHET AND P.W. BOTHA) UNTIL HE GOT SO WORKED UP THAT THE DICK POSSE HAD TO PUT DA DICKSTER ON A GURNEY AND GIVE HIM WHAT WAS CALLED "A JUICE UP."

    RISING OFF THE GURNEY, CHENEY SWORE HE WAS HE WAS CLASSIC '67 FORD MUSTANG AND NOT A GREMLIN OR PINTO HEADED FOR THE JUNKYARD CAUSING SHOUTS OF "WORD!" FROM HIS POSSE.

    HE THEN ADDRESSED THE CLAIMS THAT AL-ANBAR WAS LOST.

    "ANYONE WHO BE LAYING DOWN THAT LINE IS LIKE A TOTAL COMMIE, MOTHER F**KING, TERRORIST! YOU FEEL ME? YOU FEEL ME?" HE ASKED HAND EXTENDED IN SOME SORT OF LOW-FIVE EXPECTATION.

    WHEN TOLD THE ONE MAKING THE STATEMENTS THAT AL ANBAR WAS PROBABLY LOST WAS MARINE COL. PETE DEVLIN, DA DICKSTER BEGAN TO SOB.

    "WHO'S GONNA LOVE MY ASS?" HE SOBBED. "SERIOUSLY, WHO'S GOING SHOW THE DICK MAN JUST A LITTLE LOVING?"

    A SOMBER POSSE THEN LED HIM AWAY.







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  • who's in da house
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  • No Link between Saddam Hussein and al-Qaeda -- none
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  • Last Week In Iraq
  • Listened to while working on this edition: Michae...




  • Friday, September 08, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY SAYS "MY BAD"!

    BULLY BOY PRESS & CEDRIC'S BIX MIX -- DC.


    THIS JUST IN!

    BULLY BOY SAYS, "MY BAD".

    THE SENATE INTELLIGENCE COMMITTEE'S REPORT WAS RELEASED TODAY AND IT FOUND "NO EVIDENCE SADDAM HUSSEIN HAD A RELATIONSHIP WITH TERRORIST ABU MUSAB AL-ZARQAWI OR HIS AL-QAIDA ASSOCIATES BEFORE THE IRAQ WAR."

    ON AUGUST 21ST, BULLY BOY STATED: "I SQUARE IT BECAUSE IMAGINE A WORLD IN WHICH YOU HAD SADDAM HUSSEIN WHO HAD THE CAPACITY TO MAKE A WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION, WHO WAS PAYING SUICIDERS TO KILL INNOCENT LIFE, WHO HAD RELATIONS WITH ZARQAWI."

    WHEN CONFRONTED TODAY, BULLY BOY FIRST ATTEMPTED FART HUMOR.

    THEN HE SHRUGGED AND SAID "MY BAD" BEFORE RUSHING TO MAKE A SPEECH ONCE AGAIN FALSELY LINKING SADDAM HUSSEIN AND 9-11.



    Recommended: "Iraq Snapshot"
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    "THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY & OSAMA -- COUSINS! IDENTICAL COUSINS!"


    Thursday, September 07, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY & OSAMA -- COUSINS! IDENTICAL COUSINS!

    BULLY BOY PRESS - DC.
     
    SPEAKING WITH CBS NEWS' KATIE COURIC, BULLY BOY WAS CAUGHT OFF GUARD WHEN A CLOSED CAPTION TECHNICIAN PROVIDED DECIPHERING TO HIS REMARKS.
     
    EXAMPLE 1: WHEN BULLY BOY TOLD COURIC, "WELL, FIRST OF ALL, I DO THINK IRAQ IS A CENTRAL FRONT IN THE WAR ON TERROR AND SO DOES OSAMA BIN LADEN."
     
    THE CLOSED CAPTION READ:  "I TALK TO OSAMA AT ALL HOURS!  WE'RE LIKE TWO TEENAGE GIRLS CHATTING AWAY ON THE PHONE, GIGGLING, WONDERING WHO WOULD STAND THE BETTER CHANCE WITH HOTTY KEN MEHLMAN!  THEN WE'LL GIGGLE SOME MORE AND THEN SING THE THEME TO THE PATTY DUKE SHOW.  WE'RE COUSINS!  IDENTICAL COUSINS!"
     
     
    EXAMPLE 2: WHEN COURIC ASKED BULLY BOY FOR EXAMPLES OF INFORMATION GAINED FROM "HIGH VALUE TARGETS," HE RESPONDED: "RIGHT, WELL, FOR EXAMPLE, WE UNCOVERED A POTENTIAL ANTRAX ATTACK ON THE UNITED STATES.  OR THE FACT THAT KHALID SHEIKH MOHAMMAD HAD GOT SOMEBODY TO LINE UP PEOPLE TO FLY AIRPLANES, TO CRASH AIRLINES ON, I THINK, THE WEST COAST OR SOMEWHERE IN AMERICA.  AND THESE WOULD BE SOUTHEAST ASIANS.  IN OTHER WORDS WE'VE UNCOVERED CELLS."
     
    THE CLOSED CAPTION READ: "OH CRAP!  DID I SAY ANTHRAX!  SUPPOSE ANYONE'S REMEMBERING THAT I NEVER FOUND THE GUY SENDING ALL THAT ANTHRAX RIGHT AFTER SEPTEMBER 11TH?  I BETTER REALLY START TALKING OUT MY ASS NOW.  SOUTHEAST ASIANS?  WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ANY WAY?  I REMEMBER HOW DADDY USED TO MAKE ALL THESE JOKES ABOUT YOKO ONO.  I'M TRYING REAL HARD NOT TO LAUGH RIGHT NOW.  WHEN MY MOUTH TWITCHES, THAT'S WHAT'S GOING ON.  I FEEL GASSY.  GOT TO TELL LAURA TO QUIT PUTTING THE REFRIED BEANS ON TOP OF EVERYTHING.  LIKE THE CHEESE CAKE.  WHO EVER HEARD OF PUTTING BEAN DIP ON TOP OF THE CHEESE CAKE?  BUT WHEN I SAID THAT TO HER SHE SAID, 'YOU KNEW WHEN I MARRIED YOU I WAS A FRITO LAY GIRL!'  OH CRAP, KATIE'S STARING AT ME.  DID SHE ASK A QUESTION?"
     
     
    Recommended: "Iraq Snapshot"


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    Wednesday, September 06, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY HOLLERS "I AM A CROOK!"

     
    THIS JUST IN!
     
    BULLY BOY HOLLERS "I AM A CROOK!"
     
    IN PREPARATION FOR THEIR LAST ATTEMPT AT CAMPAIGN FOOL THE PEOPLE, THE G.O.P. HAS SCHEDULED "DIRTY DEPENDS" FOR THE ENTIRE MONTH OF SEPTEMBER AS THEY ATTEMPT TO SCARE AMERICANS INTO VOTING TO KEEP THEM IN THEIR CROOKED MAJORITY.
     
    FIRST UP ON THE DIRTY DEPENDS TOUR, BULLY BOY ADMITS TO SECRET PRISONS -- AND THEY DON'T JUST MEAN THE CLOSET WITH THE HEAVY DOOR LAURA LOCKS HIM IN WHEN HE HITS THE SAUCE! 
     
    DEMANDING THAT HIS SPEECH BE TELEVISED LIVE, BULLY BOY ADMITTED THAT THIS IS NOT A DEMOCRACY AND THAT WE NO LONGER OPERATE UNDER THE ASSUMPTION OF INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY.
     
    INSTEAD BULLY BOY GLOATED AND BOASTED OF RIPPING THE CONSTITUTION TO SHREDS AS HE STUCK HIS UGLY ASS-FACE AT THE CAMERA AND DECLARED, "DIRTY DEPENDS!  DIRTY DEPENDS!  WE HAVE NO FRIENDS! SO WE WILL SCARE YOU!  WE WILL, WE WILL SCARE YOU!  SCARE YOU!  WE WILL, WE WILL SCARE YOU!  SCARE YOU!  WE WILL, WE WILL --"
     
    STOMPING FROM THE PODIUM, BULLY BOY PURPOSEFULLY STOMPED ACROSS THE ROOM ON A CARPET ALBERT GONZALES HAD DESIGNED FOR THE EVENT USING SCRAPS FROM THE ORIGINAL U.S. CONSTITUTION. 
     
     
    In NYC, Friday September 15, Saturday September 16 and Sunday September 17 (7:00 pm each night), The People Speak directed by Will Pomerantz and Rob Urbinati.  This is a workshop adaptation of Howard Zinn and Anthony Arnove's Voices of a People's History of the United States.  The workshop will take place at The Culture Project's Bleecker Street Theater on 45 Bleecker Street.  Tickets are ten dollars and can be ordered online here or here or purchased in person at the box office (box office does not take ticket orders). For those in NYC or that will be during those dates, click here for a map.  The presentation is part of the Impact Festival.
     
     
    Recommended: "Iraq Snapshot"


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    Tuesday, September 05, 2006

    THIS JUST IN! BULLY BOY CONFESSES . . . TO WHAT?

     
    THIS JUST IN! 
     
    BULLY BOY CONFESSES . . . TO WHAT?
     
    SURVEYING THE DAMAGE HE'S DONE WITH HIS ILLEGAL WAR IN IRAQ AND HIS LAUGHABLE WAR ON "TERRAH," BULLY BOY ANNOUNCED THE UNITED STATES WAS "SAFER BUT NOT SAFE."
     
    THERE ARE TWO SCHOOLS OF THOUGHT IN CONVENTIONAL THOUGHT D.C. CIRCLES AS TO WHAT BULLY BOY MEANT BY HIS STATEMENT.
     
    THE FIRST ARGUES THAT WITH LITTLE TO POINT TO PROUDLY ON HIS RESUME THEN OR NOW, BULLY BOY APPEARED TO BE CONFESSING WHAT SOME HAD LONG ACCUSED HIM OF: HE WASN'T REALLY INVOLVED THE TEXAS RANGERS AND HE DOESN'T REALLY KNOW BASEBALL.
     
    ANYONE WHO DID WOULD GRASP THAT THERE IS NO "SAFER BUT NOT SAFE."  THERE IS "SAFE" OR THERE IS "YOU'RE OUT!" 
     
    BY DECLARING THE UNITED STATES "SAFER BUT NOT SAFE" AS A RESULT OF HIS ACTIONS, BULLY BOY IS THOUGHT BY THE SECOND SCHOOL OF CONVENTIONAL WISDOME TO HAVE BEEN SEEKING SOME SORT OF NATIONAL UMPIRE (THE PEOPLE?) TO DECLARE HIM OUT.
     
    LET THE IMPEACHMENT BEGIN.
     
     
     
     


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